Illman (illman) wrote,

  • Mood:


I'm considering calling in sick at work. I've never called in sick at work aside from the time when I was in the hospital. Calling in sick feels wrong, and today I'm only physically exhausted and tired. But I've been to work sick, exhausted and suicidal before. I've stood at the train station on my way home from work and considered thowing myself in front of an incoming train. In comparison physical exhaustion doesn't seem like a valid reason to miss work. But I slept all morning aside from a doctors appointment where doc was very concerned about my slow speech and low functionality. I appear lacking in the IQ department. Furter appts. on Thursday and next Tuesday. Maybe I should have gone to the emergency room last night after a backed into an opened window. But it only left a big bump and a headache. I so didn't feel like wasting my time sitting around for three hours on a Sunday night.

ETA: No need to call in sick. I called the secreatary. She said that the professor hadn't given the first class yet, so the tuturing group (which I'm teaching) is cancelled this week. Yay, I can stop worrying about bumbing into thing, I can go back to the couch.

The WaT, Profiler and Alias DVDs arrived today, I'm still waiting on some books. Let the viewing begin. I finally started watching Atlantis yesterday. I was pretty whacked out, so I has a bit of trouble following, but it was good. Definetly a show to keep watching even though I'm going to cut down from last year.

One useful suggestion got made today. If I'm mentally fit enough for university, that is if I can concentrate and if my memory is sharp enough. It doesn't really have to be as good as it used to, but if I'm just not good up for the associated stress of university and living on my own. Right now, I rely heavily on others to do the day to day things. Since I've started seeing so poorly, I haven't been out on my own. Taxilan had made standing up straight a challenge, but it's the only thing that's been able to put a stop to the crazy, intrusive thoughts. So if moving out is not a good idea, and the parental can see that, they suggested that I go for an online degree programme. There is one German online university in Hagen. A few other universities have online courses. There is Open University in the UK. It should be possible to dig something up there. It might be a good compromise between going back to academics and staying in a supportive environment.

Lecture Schedule
+ one weekly Maths tutorial
+ one weekly Chem tutorial
+ one weekly Physics revision class
+ Thursday and Friday 11 a.m. - 6 p.m. at the lab

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