November 9th, 2004


Where did the brain go?

Totally out of it today. Cannot seem to think straight or move straight. I could have made it to the first lecture, walking really fast. But after getting up, I was stumbling across the room, trying to get legs and brain to work together, so I decided that I was going nowhere fast. Made the 2nd lecture. No idea what the physics lecturer was on this morning, he was unusually bouncy and happy, pointing out how exciting the equations were and how pretty everything looked summed up in a table. The table actually might be good idea. I haven't managed much since I got back. It's all very hazy. Maybe I should go to the library. It's at least warm there and I can't wander off to bed. Theere are a few things that I really need to do today:

  • email the lab suprvisor

  • go to the problem class at 2:30

  • pick up meds at the pharmacy

  • since already in town, buy food

  • read physics

  • have a real meal

  • Current Mood
    cold cold

What I learned today

  • tremors are bad, but taking the good stuff to calm them down isn't a good idea if there is still stuff to attend

  • it's possible to survive a tutorial while being quite drugged

  • it's pointless to try to explain why it's an achievement to make it to a 9 a. m. lecture

  • I'm afraid of the next few days when body and brain get used to re-adding of Lamotrigine

  • I miss Em - I can to talk to her about things mental and meds

  • right now, I just want to be home, where I can sleep as long as I need to and where nobody gives me a weird look when I randomly start crying in a down mood phase

Overall the day was not that bad, just the usual, tired, hazy and moderatly wild moods. I even studied and got various things from town. I'm probably just extra cranky because it's cold in here (I'm sitting here typing with a big warm blanket around me. They said the heating should start working by the middle of this week. But well, that's what they said last week too. It's not just one building without heating and reliable hot water - buildings 20 - 26 aren't completely finished.
  • Current Mood
    exhausted exhausted