March 20th, 2007

B5 - Doom

Tuesday is talk day

Group therapy, group meeting, meeting with the therapists and Dr. H.

Aside from still being pissed off at Dr. H, I'm rather curious as to what he has to say. I'm mentally daring him to bring up the questionary from yesterday, because he can either tell me the autism specialist was right after all (I put the right answers for that on the questionaire) or he can tell me that he has no intention to change my meds the way I think he should and then I'm out of there. I don't need to hang around and listen to patronizing therapists if nothing is going to happen anyways.

And yeah, I should be at breakfast right now, but I'm eating too much anyways.
Cold Case -snow

(no subject)

It was a difficult day. I'm no longer so much angry as I'm exhausted and simply tired of the whole mess.

My meeting with Dr. H did not go very well. He fels he cannot accept the new diagnosis such as it is. He says the questuionaires I filled out were inconclusive. I told him I wanted to leave and not do anymore tests because I feel that I cannot agree with his treatment approach (i.e. doing nothing). He pretty much ignored that and ended our conversation. I was very angry, in fact so angry that I took the first bus back home and stayed there until dinner time. The break has helped calm me done some and talk things over with people without their own agenda.

My parents pretty much agree with me that the chances of actually getting better treatment at the hospital, are rather slim. Dr. H is adamant that I cannot go off any of my meds and that part of our disagreement which I don't see being resolved.

I don't know for sure what I'm going to do tomorrow. I'm very tempted to simply call it quits and go home. I don't see anything good coming out of staying any longer. But I do want to wait until I have spoken to the two doctors who are supporting the new diagnosis / getting off the old meds. I for once want to know if they know anyone with actual experience with autism who might take me on as an outpatient and make the recommended med changes.

Two unrelated notes:

Someone ate all my vanilla chololate!
The scarf is now 7 feet long.
I finished reading Area 7 and Scarecrow this morning.
After checking out the local bookshop this morning, I feel the need to spend some money at amazon.